I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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