I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
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