Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
You're 34. You can't make guys wait till the third date anymore. Step it up!
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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