I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Have your arms or hands ever gone numb after drinking too much?
Wtf did you do last night?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
What are your plans?
Get picked up. Convince you to leave work. Smoke. Drink. Fly helicopters.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
It's 5am and I come home to you naked on the kitchen table and 3 people I never saw before fucking on the back porch ... and my weed gummy worms are gone. fuck you I'm taking your mom's offer
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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