Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
