So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
i wish starbucks made bloody marys
I just saw a homeless man with a cat on a leash. reminded me of you.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
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