East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
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