At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Whoa!!! Accidentally took a dump in chick's bathroom at Red Robin. 1 hr for coast to be clear. Women's farts sound like geese taking last breath. Liars.
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
The question of "Will I eat a piece of curried chicken off the floor?" has been answered tonight.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Well its kinda hard to gift wrap an orgasm
Dick in a box?
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
