I got chris browned last night
put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
She ran from her surprise party screaming "I'm not ready for an intervention." Yeah, the girl has a problem.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
