If I had a nickel for every time I've used a condom, I'd have... two nickels.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
I'm going to rise like a phoenix out of the drunken, shameful ashes that were last weekend.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
You're like the curious george of whores
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
I will pee on everything he values.
There's nothing worse than carrying your fairy crown and wings home wearing fishnets
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
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