is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Just got booted from water taxi for showing my balls to a security guard.
he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
just when his roommates walked in, we were naked in the kitchen. proceeded to awkwardly pretzel walk back into his room to cover each other (not that they haven't seen me naked plenty of times) and continue to have glorious morning sex. his roomates love me.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
How is it that I can make it to my 8am Friday morning still drunk after passing out the night before...but not to my 9am on Tuesday that I went to bed early for? Irony or karma?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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