White coat. Heels.
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize
