Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
i may have given a gay guy with a mohawk my number last night that said... "you are straight" omg so glad a whole year til my next birthday... also i hit myself in the face with a car door. nice.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
What's the worst that could happen? I'm already broke and my leg's already broken
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
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