Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
I just learned my tits were fire resistant. I should join the freakin circus
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
Randomize
