Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
at one point, you reached into your purse, pulled out a tampon, and proceeded to rub it on your lips like chapstick... that drunk
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
Fuck you. Fuck this party. I just wanted to be pretty with a cute little tiara and boys sucking my tits, now i have a hangman game drawn on my face and jello shots in my hair.
I wanted to give you a great birthday party. You know I did.
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
Randomize
