i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
Seriously... Things should be way more awkward... The entire female half of the bridal party INCLUDING THE BRIDE blew me in high school....
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
We watched the first ever season of SNL and fucked for so long. He accidentally punched me in the face, but I mean, John Belushi was the background noise of our sex. I can deal with it.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
Randomize
