HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
If you magically turned into a tall white gay guy, ignore this message. If not, then I'm sure someone has your fb password.
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Dear god my vagina.
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