You realize it's finals week?
Ya that's the school's fault. St. Patrick's day came first.
This is how we made chicken soup last night: Whole chicken in a pot of vodka with a box of crackers and some carrots. We should go pro.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
Doing tequila shots with my ex to celebrate that we broke up... not awkward at all.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
