Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Oh, and my friends believe you should reimburse me for the brazilian that was gone to waste.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Life update: This fucking MacBook repair guy called me over last night for a booty call and he didn’t have a condom OR a bed
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
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