9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
Sober January is a disaster.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Smoking weed with a blind guy, don't worry he's chill.
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
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