i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Wednesday is my day of reflection and making my dick and balls into shapes. So i'll be pretty busy.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
