But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
That's intense
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. �Hello 29...
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
