you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
The homeless ppl in LA are great. Theres sum guy that makes all of his clothes out of tighty whitey underwear. He makes bags out of them 2. Presumably 2 hold more underwear.
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
