I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I dont think he was a real cab driver. I think he was just a creepy guy with a van.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Randomize
