VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Tonight was like the Noah's Ark of alcohol. I had to have two of everything.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
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