Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
he laminated a picture of his dick.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Randomize
