oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
My mom was talking about how protein is essential to strong bones and then I told her, I'll give you protein.
How unfortunate for your Mom.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I can't turn my head to the left, I'm pissing out of my ass, and my finger went through the toilet paper today... I need you.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
i out mim tonsoeep
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
Randomize
