this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He said "ride me pocahontas" while I was on top of him last night
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
He tells me he loves me and I say I just want him for sex, then he looks at me like I just said I hate puppies. What kind of guy is he?
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
It's a goat... but where the fuck did it come from?
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
Change of plans & whoring it up tonight
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
