I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
did i walk over a car last night?
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
I made him breakfast and we cuddled on the couch watching march of the penguins, which is, in case you were unaware, the opposite of fucking on a pool table
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
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