dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
Just learned the hard way that dicks can bruise the back of your throat to the extent that you cant eat. You're dead to me.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
Randomize
