Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
no one was sober enough to set up jenga so we just threw the pieces at the last person to drink
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
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