I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
