is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
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