u know ur drinking tonight lol i dont know why you try to deny it
but i dont wanna get emotional and drunk text
then give me ur phone
NEVER!!
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
No it wasn't her, this girl had both hands.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Yo I'm texting you while getting a bj. I know, I'm the man. Told her I was texting my mom in the hospital.
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Giant stained glass jesus is judging my black pleather pants
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
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