dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
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