It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Randomize
