there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You put a thong on my pumpkin didn't you.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
She is crazy, dude. She actually bit me on the gootch.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Saw the Peanut butter guy at checkout he had at least 30 containers of it and like 6 different kinds...
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
Randomize
