We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
It's like a harem of immaturity and bad ideas...and that's coming from me
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
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