Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
My grandma paid her handyman in pain killers. I now know why this is in my genes
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
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