We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
don't ever try to run hungover. just puked mid-run in front of an old couple that were going for a walk. they were horrified.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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