so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
Please tell me how you drunkenly remembered your social security number when we were checking you into the ER.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I hope you get stoned and think that you're a seal in shark infested waters
The thing about pooping in the woods during hunting season is you never know if someone's watching you.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
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