3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
