just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Randomize
