it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
the doctor brought back painful memories by lecturing me about your teeth marks that are still on my dick.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Last night dinner was cinnamon buns and whiskey. At least tonight I had a fajita with my cookies and tequila. I may be a little stressed about these end of semester tests.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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