p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
Randomize
