she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
my roommate was being a bitch so I changed my Netflix password on her. 21st century slap in the face ladies and gentleman
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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