1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
Randomize