found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
finding my wedding ring encrusted in vomit this morning really just topped off last night...
I will never get the visual of you crying while chewing christmas lights out of my head
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
Needless to say, I woke up on the bathroom floor wearing the dress that my mom wore to the wedding. That open bar stole my soul.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
I'm like, not good at living.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
