WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
You just wrote a check for drugs...pretty sure you don't have cash for beer..
btw I told him that the only way he was gonna get to eat you out was if he smothered your vag with grits..
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
i stood outside in the bushes for thirty minutes. Do you know how many drunk guys pee in bushes at 2 am?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
