Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Randomize
